Domestic Violence

Excuses or Choices

It never fails, NEVER! I talk to women who have been abused as children and GUESS WHAT???!!!?? THEY ARE WITH ABUSERS either married to them or living with them (some even have children!).

They make all the excuses one can think of:
* He doesn’t hit me; often
* He only choked me a couple of times
* But you don’t know what I did to deserve it
* I was being stupid
* I embarrassed him in front of XYZ
* But I love him/her
* But She/He loves me

The list goes on and on; FOREVER! In case you didn’t know, let me tell you something.
Hello, my name is Lou-Ellen and I am an abuse survivor. I was:
* Sexually
* Verbally
* Emotionally
* Physically
* & Financially ABUSED!!!

For me it started out as a young child, at the tender age of seven (7). (For the complete story of my life CLICK HERE ) In my defense, I grew up with abuse without KNOWING it was abuse; therefore, I married an abusive man. It took me 13 years and three children to realize that there were no unicorns or rainbows here.

I know that there is nothing and I mean NOTHING I can do or say to those who don’t want to listen, move, leave, or protect themselves. I know that they don’t feel worthy of anything other than what they have.

But THAT IS NOT TRUE!!! You or they have not realized your worth, your value. The definition of value is:
the regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.
The definition of worth is:
the value equivalent to that of someone or something under consideration; the level at which someone or something deserves to be valued or rated.

SOOOOO… I’m going to close this with a few questions. You can email them to or not as is your choice. You can write them in a journal, or not as it is your choice. But if you truly want to change the life you are living to be free from abuse, answer them!

  1. what does your life look like to you, abuse free?
  2. Describe your abuse free day.
  3. What steps do you need to take to be abuse free?
  4. If you had total freedom to rearrange your life today to align with your values, with no outside obstacles or objections, what would your top priorities be?
  5. What do you need in order to find your courage or energy you need to stand up for yourself?

Remember, God Loves you and so do I!
1 John 3:1 “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know HIM.”

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About Lou

I am the light to brighten the way. Come on in and let's talk any day. I'm here to lend a shoulder or an ear. One can always leave me messages on here.
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